Purple Hair

Yeah this is old. I meant to post it weeks ago, but I have tiny babies and a bad short term memory. Don't hate.
I decided a while ago that my hair needed to be purple again. A charming shade of heliotrope would do. It's really not that hard. If I can do it with a 7 week old and a toddler on my hands you can do it too.

First off you'll have to bleach. Lucky for me my hair is already blonde, so all I have to do is my roots:

Sexy right?

If you've never bleached your hair, just follow the directions on the package. They'll walk you through it step by step.
Now add the purple! I like Manic Panic's Ultra Violet, but there are lots of choices, choose what you like. I also dilute mine a bit with conditioner so that it isn't as dark. There is no science behind it I just mix some in.

And you thought I couldn't get any sexier...

I usually use an applicator brush, but I won't lie, sometimes I just slap that shit on like conditioner and brush it through. Works just as well, honestly. Leave it in for 45 minutes then rinse it out with cold water (the coldest you can stand!). I like to do a vinegar rinse at this point, it's supposed to help the color last longer. Not sure if this is actually the case, but vinegar is cheap, and a great conditioner, so who cares? After it's dry run a flat iron through it to seal the color in. Voila. Luscious purple locks.

Warning: Tiny babies may be terrified of you now.

Don't worry, pop em in a sling and they'll forgive you!

DIY Woven Wrap

Ok so for the past week my husband has been out of town for work, and I knew I would need something to keep my hands busy while he was gone. As you know I wear my babies. Up until now I have survived with a ring sling, a faux moby, and a couple of circular wraps. Then I learned about woven wraps. Oh my gosh you guys WOVEN WRAPS. They come in all shades, sizes, fabrics, and patterns. Swoooooon!

And HOLY CRAP are they expensive. Sure, sure, many will argue that they are worth the price. I mean they are HAND WOVEN, on a LOOM. Those people are right. Totally worth it. But in case you haven't noticed yet, I'm cheap, and broke, and dear husband is an unwilling participant in the government furlough (don't get me started), so we're even poorer than we would normally be... So I decided to make my own! Booyah.

One of my friends introduced me to this group, and they helped me loads in learning how.

First thing I did was find out what size I wanted. I decided a size 4 sounded good (completely arbitrarily since I've never owned one and had no idea). Then I decided on a fabric. Although linen, and linen/cotton blends are good, they are expensive, and since expensive is what I'm trying to avoid I opted for osnaburg. Osnaburg is a woven cotton utility fabric usually found near the muslin at the fabric store. I got mine from Hancock Fabrics for dirt cheap. It retailed for $3.99, but I had a 50% off coupon and 15% off for military appreciation so I got it for less than $2/yard!!! Hells yes! I bought 4 yards as a size 4 is just shy of 12 feet, and I knew the fabric would shrink when washed. 

I got that baby home threw it in the washer on hot, and then dried it on high heat. I quickly ironed it, and that baby was ready to cut! (I learned after the fact that it is easier to tear osnaburg.)

Wraps only need to be about 32" and since my fabric was 43" it needed to lose a few!

After I trimmed the width I decided to do tapers. I free handed a slight curve into mine. (Tapers make knotting easier, but as I discovered, shorten the length of your wrap, as you tie above the taper, so in the end I ended up with a long size 3).

UPDATE: DO NOT CUT YOUR TAPERS LIKE THIS!!! If you want a taper cut in one direction leaving your final product looking like a parallelogram (not a trapezoid or in my case with two pointed ends). If you cut it like I did you won't be able to tighten your rails easily and you will be frustrated and want to kill your wrap. SO, like THIS: /----/, not like this: /----\ or <---->. 

Next it needed to be hemmed. A rolled hem is best to prevent your wrap from tearing and for bearing the weight of your baby. All this means is that you fold it over twice before sewing. I did myself a favor and ironed mine, I suggest you do too.

Then I just sewed around the edges!

I had to try it on immediately. I take horrible selfies, but you get the point. :)

Now the natural fiber color is pretty, but it just isn't my style so I started looking into dying options. I quickly found out that Rit dye is a no-no for babies. Babies like to suck on their carriers. They think it's delicious.

So dying with caustic chemicals seemed like a bad idea. I decided to try to use natural dyes, you know, do it old school. At which point I stumbled upon this:

Check out her tutorial here.

 Gorgeous right?!? I wanted that. ^THAT is fabric dyed with turmeric. So I ran to my local organic market which happens to have an awesome bulk spice section and I bought myself a bag of turmeric ($.89!!). The only other thing I needed was Alum, which I already had (thanks mom!), so I set to work.

I decided to do a test run with scraps I had leftover from cutting, and it's a good thing I did! My Facebook group Dyed Baby Carriers taught me about the importance of Soda Ash (otherwise known as washing soda or sodium carbonate) in the traditional dying process. I thought I would try it with just turmeric and alum first, since that's what my tutorial said to do (sorry I forgot to take pictures of this step). After that I gradually added washing soda. Here's what happened:

It turned the turmeric a deep burgandy/orange color. Neat! But totally not what I was going for...

Here are my scraps drying.

This is what they looked like after I threw them in the dryer:

Whoa! Totally gorgeous, right? I concluded that if I wanted that bright sunshiny yellow I shouldn't add any soda ash at all.

Thanks to the tutorial I knew I needed a 2:3 ratio of alum to turmeric. I used 1/4 cup Alum and 1/3 cup Turmeric.

I knew that was right thanks to this:

Thanks measure magnet! :)

I poured them all in my biggest stock pot and waited for them to come to a boil.

Once it was boiling I turned it down to a simmer and added my fabric (which I wet down first in the sink).

I let it hang out in there on low heat for about an hour, giving it a poke every now and then with a shish kabob stick to make sure it was getting dyed evenly (don't use anything that you don't mind turning yellow to stir your wrap). After that I dumped it into the sink and rinsed it under cold water.

This didn't work for 2 reasons:

1) I'm lazy

2) I'm impatient

So I threw that sucker into the washer to finish rinsing.

After it dried it looked like this!

Whoa! Great picture. Thank you, little man, for the photo bomb. Almost managed to get your face in there didn't you?

It didn't turn out as bright as my scrap did. I'll admit I'm a little disappointed, but really it did turn out pretty gorgeous considering I had no idea what I was doing and it was basically a massive science experiment. 

After this I decided, Gee, that burgundy color is awfully pretty. I should try a gradient dye! So here is what I did. Again I followed this tutorial (sort of).

I found a tub and hung my wrap from pants hangers over the shower curtain rod that I moved down. It was too long to fit in the bathtub, so I settled for just outside (hey, at least it's still in the bathroom!). I mixed my turmeric and water and this time I added 1/4 washing soda to turn it that awesome burg color. I made just enough to fill the bottom inch or so of the tub.

I used a marker to mark how much warm water I wanted to add to make the gradient (this turned out to be a superfluous step as a tea kettle full raised the water about an inch). I let my wrap steep for about 20 minutes and then started adding water every 5 minutes. After every add I refilled my kettle and put it back on the burner, because I wanted my water to stay hot.

Be careful not to splash when you pour in the water or it will leave marks on your wrap. I didn't do such a great job!

I kept adding water until I reached the top of my tub, at which point I pulled the wrap out and let it drip for about 20 minutes to let the dye set (in retrospect I think I should have just let it dry without rinsing, but se la vie).

Wrap before rinsing. SO pretty!!

I then rinsed it in the tub, and threw it in the dryer. This is what I ended up with:

Yeah... not so much what I expected. But it's my first dye job, it was bound to be imperfect! Cy doesn't seem to mind, in fact he fell asleep in the time it took me to wrap him and take a picture. Maybe I'll try again... maybe I won't. But there you have it. Naturally dyed sunshine/gradient wrap. I love it.

Meal Planning. You know you want to.

Okay, so this is something I've just started doing. I have a problem with going to the grocery store or farmers market, and being so freaking excited about all of the fresh produce that I buy way too much for my family of 3 (I know there are four of us, but really, one is on the boob, so he doesn't count), and I (we) end up wasting more than I would like to admit. My solution? Plan out your freaking meals. Easier said than done right? WRONG. It is so freaking easy people. You know you already spend half your day on Pinterest. You know you pin recipes all of the time. So take a couple of those recipes and make them you lazy bum! And give yourself a break for crying out loud. You're not a freaking Stepford wife. Only plan to make at the most 5 meals. Seriously. I know there are 7 days a week, but by only planning 5, you might actually do it. The other 2 days can be leftovers days, or pb&j's. Me? On those days I tend to make a salad. Salads are easy. Throw some lettuce on a plate and then put all the other crap you have lying around (apples, grapes, leftover chicken, leftover veggies, cottage cheese, almonds, hard boiled eggs, lunch meat... you get the idea) on top along with some oil and vinegar, and BAM! you have a salad. Easy peasy.

We do grocery shopping once a week. At which point I make a list of our everyday things. You know like, eggs, milk, bread, etc. So do that. Then when your done making that list, get on Pinterest (you know you're already logged on), find your recipes, and write down the ingredients that you don't already have on hand. Make a freaking grocery list people! On one side write what you need. On the other side write down the meals you're going to make. Now go buy your groceries! And do yourself and your wallet a favor, only buy the things on your list. That way you won't waste anything. Also since you only bought the ingredients for the meals you planned, you have no choice but to make those meals. Here's my list from this week:

(Sorry for the crappy photo. And NO I'm not making toilet paper for dinner it just got thrown on there as an after thought so I didn't forget it.)

It's so fancy. You know you're jealous.

Now slap that bad boy on your fridge so you don't forget what you're making this week.

***Make your life even easier. Make a board on Pinterest called "What's for Dinner." Search recipes from all over the web and pin them to that board. That way you don't have to go searching for your recipes when your ready to make them. They will all be in one space. You can even delete them or move them to another board at the end of the week so that you only have that weeks recipes to look at. Here's my recipe board if you're interested.

*****All of the recipes above are my own except for the pan enchiladas which you can find here. This is what I'm making tonight (if you have yet to check out Thug Kitchen, do it now. Gangster Vegan Chef? Be still my heart. You're welcome).

Dion's Greek Dressing? FUCK. YES.

So anyone raised in Albuquerque already knows exactly what I'm talking about. Anyone who has moved away can commiserate with just how much I miss Dion's. So the other day I open my email and I find THIS:

Courtney Halbig	Jun 22 (7 days ago)
to me

1/2c olive oil
3/4c red wine vinegar
1 1/2t oregano
1 1/2t basil
1 1/2t garlic powder
1 1/4t pepper
1 1/4t salt
1 1/4t onion powder
1 1/4t Dijon

That, my friend, is the recipe for Dion's Greek dressing. Put that tasty son of a bitch on a salad because it's hot as fuck.

A RECIPE FOR DION'S GREEK DRESSING?!? Fuck. Yes.
Seriously though. If you've never had it; make it. Right. NOW. You're welcome. If you still live in NM. Well you're still welcome. Make that shit at home and save yourself some money. Personally I'm a turkey and swiss kind of girl. So I put that shiz on a turkey sub with fresh veggies and my mouth had an orgasm (my husband was pretty excited too).

Cloth Wet Wipes, for Clean Butts.

I've recently had a couple of people suggest that I start blogging. Well what they don't know is that I sort of half heartedly tried that already. The results were less than awesome (although meaningful to me as they recorded the journey of my pregnancy and the birth of my first child). So here I am trying again. I can't tell you how flattered and humbled I am that people actually think the things I do are worth reading about, or even more shocking; worth emulating. This time around I plan to write about things other than (but not excluding!) making and having babies. Things like cooking and sewing and crafting. I have tons of projects that I've done that would've made cool blog posts, but since I've already finished them and I don't have any photographs of the process I figured my best bet would be to start from today (although I am in the process of writing out Cyan's birth story, so that will be here some day for you to read.)

So I spent the better part of yesterday afternoon cutting out cloth wet wipes, and most of this morning sewing them.

Look at those pretty wipes all ready to be sewn!

Cloth wet wipes, you might ask? What the hell are those? Well exactly what they sound like. Wet wipes, er... made from cloth. Most of you already know that I am frugal (savvy, thrifty, cheap), yeah I said it. I'm CHEAP. I admit it. There is nothing I hate more than spending money on something unnecessarily. Especially something I know I can make myself for less. I'd like to think that makes me "green," but really I know it's just me being cheap.  Why on earth would I continue to buy disposable wet wipes when I can save a fortune and make reusable ones myself?!?  That would be madness! Pure madness!! I digress. When I first started my cloth diapering adventures with baby #1 I was using old fashioned throw away wet wipes. The problem? When I went to go put the poopy diaper into the hamper I had to fish out the dirty wipes and throw them away. GROSS. People always tell me I'm brave for  cloth diapering (all that poop!) but really folks, I don't like touching poop anymore than you do.

At the time I was part of a local group of cloth diapering mamas, and we got together to discuss all things cloth diaper (geeky right??) I know, I know, but really it was the best information exchange a noob like me could have asked for. One of the awesome ladies from the group asked me why I didn't just use cloth wipes (DUH!/lightbulb/forehead slap)? Well obviously. And being the cheapskate crafty person that I am, I immediately went to Walmart in search of fabric (don't judge me! Walmart is cheap, and Goldsboro didn't have many options). I quickly found a bolt of revolting leopard print flannel for $1/yard. Flannel is perfect because it is durable and soft. Leopard print is perfect because who gives a crap? We're wiping poop here. And $1/yard? Hells yes! I quickly whipped up a batch of cloth wipes, and I was (and still am) very happy with the results. No more fishing out wipes! They ALL go into the hamper and the wash together. Booyah!

Old wipes. You know you think the leopard print is fly.

Well this time around, although Weiland is potty training and out of cloth diapers, he hasn't mastered the self butt wipe and needs some ASSistance (haha I've got jokes). So I found that I didn't have enough wipes for both babes. I bought some more flannel ($1/yard!!) and set to work.

They are super easy to make. You just cut out rectangles (or squares, or trapezoids, I don't care, whatever floats your boat), in my case I used a plastic storage container from Target as a template, and sewed two pieces together, zig-zagging around the edges. Easy peasy.

Had to take a feed the baby break when I was SO close to the finish line!

Now what do you use to make them wet and, er... wipey, you might ask? Well that's pretty darn easy too. I just took an aluminum water bottle that I had lying around the house (any bottle would do), and mixed a squirt of baby shampoo, about a tablespoon of olive oil, a few drops of tea tree oil, and warm water. BLAMO! Instant wet wipe solution.

The line up.

You could probably just use warm water and baby shampoo, but you would have to make just enough for one day, because they would start to smell foul after that, and lets face it I'm too lazy efficient for that noise. I like to make the whole batch at once. Who's got time to make fresh wipes each day? Not this girl. So I found adding tea tree oil helps tons. It's naturally anti-bacterial so it keeps away the funk. Plus I like the way it smells. Now your probably wondering why I use olive oil. Well the thing is it lubes up the wipes. Yeah lubes. Baby butt lube if you will (WOW that sounds horrible after writing it...) But really, they wipe better. The oil makes them a little bit slippery and aids in the whole process.

So there you go. Put the wipes in container with a lid, pour the solution over them, and you are good to go my friend.

Hooray for clean butts!

(And before anyone asks: NO, I was not planning for a girl. NO, I do not care that the wipes/container are "girly." NO I do not think that my sons care if the things used to wipe their butts are not "manly," nor do I think they will be scarred for life because of it. If you are worried about that, get a life! These are literally made to get shit on. Who cares!)

Super Fun Infant Games

So Weiland played a lot of fun games this morning. They were SO fun in fact, that I thought I would share them with everyone else. The first one was called the "It's four in the morning and I'm wide awake and there is nothing you can do about it" game. This game in and of itself isn't TOO bad, but it was being played concurrently with the "I'm not hungry but I'm going to use you as a human pacifier" game. FUN times! Then came the "It's five a.m. and I'm still wide awake but I'm PISSED OFF because I told you there was nothing you could do about it, but you keep trying to give me my binky and make me fall asleep" game. This one makes you REALLY want to tear your hair out. And finally: the (and this is THE MOST FUN in my opinion) "Okay I'm tired now but I will only sleep if you keep me in your arms at a 52° angle and bounce me every third second with a double bounce every fifth time" game. So my son is FINALLY asleep, but guess who's playing the "It's 8:24 in the morning and I'm wide awake and there is nothing you can do about it game?" **Sigh**



UPDATE:

So immediately after posting this blog my omniscient little son realized that mommy was awake and woke himself up with a tremendous fart. Mommy proceeded to change his diaper, said fart having turned out to be a "shart," and we embarked on a new game I like to call the "I pee AND poop on you, me, and the surrounding area" game. This one involves multiple costume and scenery changes. SO we moved to stage 2: The SHOWER. Where through an ironic twist, the washcloth I chose (the one with cute little baby chicks on it) happened to have the exact same coloring as my son's poop, so I at first didn't notice that we were playing round two of "I pee AND poop on you, me, and the surrounding area" game. But lucky for me, The SHOWER, comes with SOAP! TAKE THAT IRONY!! I won that round. We move on to the drying off stage of the game, and yep, you guessed it: ROUND 3 of the "I pee AND poop on you, me, and the surrounding area" game. Touche little poop monkey, touche. So after a third round of costume changes and a thorough wipe down of the surrounding area(s), I gave in to fate and acknowledged that my son, myself, and the surrounding area(s) just might smell faintly of soiled baby diaper for the rest of the day. Sorry people who might interact with me today, I've learned a valuable lesson; that when tiny people play games with you, you rarely win, and you NEVER have the last word (or poop - as the case may be).

Wehadababyeeetsaboy!

It was 2:30 pm and my husband and I headed to my 40 weeks doctor's appointment (one day after my due date). I had been having irregular contractions on and off for the past two days, but now that my sister and mom had arrived I was really hoping things were progressing. The doctor examined me and I was only dilated to a measly one centimeter, but I had had some minor "leakage" and I thought that maybe my amniotic sac had a tear. I asked the Doctor to check for me, and before the words were out of my mouth a big flow of fluid gushed out of me. Yep my water broke right then and there. The doctor then proceeded to manhandle the shit out of me (I guess he was stripping my membranes?) and told me to get dressed and head to the hospital. At this point my adrenaline started pumping a little bit! Holy crap I was about to have a baby!

When we got to the hospital they wheeled me to the maternity unit and got me hooked up to about a bazillion different monitors. Little did I know at the time but this meant that I would be stuck in bed for the rest of my labor.

I was having mild contractions at the time but I was content to wait it out and let my labor progress on its own. At some point during the peak of a contraction my water REALLY broke. It scared the shit out of me! I thought that had already happened, and this second gush of fluid had me convinced that I was dying. This is when shit got real. My contractions got very strong at that point.

After about 6 hours of intense back labor the doctor came in to check me. I had progressed to 3.5cm. That's about 1cm every three hours. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?? I damn near had a panic attack right then and there.

I decided it might be prudent to take something to "take the edge off." Little did I know.... whatever crazy ass shit they gave me proceeded to make feel at first very stoned, and then later to pass out completely, which sounds great, right? WRONG. I woke up at the peak (read: MOST PAINFUL part) of each contraction - which were now coming right on top of each other. The result being that I was only cognizant for the most excruciating parts of my labor. I remember only being aware enough to pray for the pain to stop, and as it started to fade I was unconscious again. I remember hearing my panicked husband saying that my eyes were rolling into the back of my head, and I wondered if I was overdosing on whatever it was that they had given me.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity the drugs started to wear off. I have no idea how long it really was. At this point I decided I wanted the epidural. So much for my natural child birth. I cried the whole time while the nurse held me still and the anesthesiologist stuck a needle in my spine.

After that the pain went away swiftly, but I could not longer move or feel my lower extremities. The next time the doctor came to check on me my labor had completely stopped. F****ing awesome.

Oh did I mention that my labor happened to fall in the wake of a full moon? Yeah, I was about to have my baby along with every other pregnant woman in Wayne county. It turns out that I wasn't the most important preggo in there and I didn't see another nurse for the rest of the night. Hours went by... I dozed, my husband tried to... And then came the golden hour: 7:00am - SHIFT CHANGE TIME.

In sweeps an angel named Dee. Can I just tell you that I LOVED Dee? She swept in with her cute little pixie cut, all business and said "Are you ready to have a baby?"
"Hells yes!"
and chop chop lickity split she got. shit. done.

It was such a relief after a night of being ignored and wondering when I was going to finally have this little boy! Before I knew it the doctor was in the room and telling me to PUSH! PUSH PUSH PUSH.
So I did. And I pushed some more. I'm not really sure how long I pushed but it was wonderful. So many leaps and bounds better than the nightmare of the night before. And then he was there. He was beautiful and aware and weighed 7 pounds 9 ounces. And I was TIRED, tired and THIRSTY. And then the next most wonderful thing next to having a beautiful healthy little boy happened: I got to EAT and DRINK! It was the best meal of my life!

So that's the story of how Weiland Stockton Rompf made his way into the world, and how mommy discovered that any food (even hospital food) is delicious to a starving person.